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 Most couples suspect at some stage or another that their partner is cheating on them. Thankfully, more often than not these suspicions are unfounded. However, In one survey, approximately 20% of couples were have found to be unfaithful at one stage or another in their lives. The reasons it happens are complex - men are often happy in a relationship yet attribute a one night stand to drunkenness or a moment of madness. With females, it is often the cause of an unhappy relationship that makes them cheat.
But what are the telltale symptoms we should look out for? How we tell if our partner is cheating?
1. Secrecy - We should all be able to tell our partners where we are going or who we are meeting. Often, we have friends our partner's dislike, yet we are still able to say we are meeting them. Being furtive about where you are going or who you are meeting is a classic sign of someone having an affair. Another type of secrecy is locking the cell phone to prevent access or getting a secondary cell phone. 2.Lies - In order to have an affair it is normally necessary to lie. People often claim to have worked late, to have gone for a drink, to have said they were somewhere when they were not. Holes often appear in these stories over time, little trinkets of information which consistently add up. 3. Unusual spending patterns - 'Unfortunately', affairs cost money. Restaurants, hotels, drinks and even presents can all leave a money trails to be followed. In a normal relationship, couples think nothing of leaving receipts or bills lying around. Affairs do not allow this to happen as financial spending must be hidden. Some people also try pay with cash for hotels or meals so that no paper trace is available. However, the cash must be withdrawn from somewhere and this will also turn up in banking statements. 4. Loss of intimacy - Having an affair can often mean a loss of intimacy with your partner. People who grow apart in a relationship often stray as the physical and emotional bonds are not there to keep them together. 5. Patterns- We all have a daily routine as much as we may hate to admit it. Not all of our lives are James Bond movie thrillers. Cheating on your partner however, involves a certain amount of disruption to this routine. Furtive meetings, prolonged encounters and late nights can all throw our routine off schedule and make it hard to explain to our partners. When she goes to the shop for milk and arrives back five hours later its time to start poking. 6. Friends - It's a small world. Even in large cities or on far flung 'business' trips, it's quite possible to know someone who knows someone who knows you. When a friend or an acquaintance says they saw your partner with someone and you weren’t aware of it, listen a little harder. 7. Objects - Lipstick on a collar is probably the most famous sign of betrayal. However, using personal cars or homes often leave tell tale signs - a forgotten bottle of perfume or a misplaced set of keys lying around. Be careful not to jump to conclusions on finding a lost object in the house as it may merely belong to a friend. On the other hand, finding some unknown underwear in your bedroom should set alarm bells ringing..... 
8. Finding a man in your bedroom. A dead giveaway. He is not a plumber and there is nothing wrong with the shower. Trust us on this. Its amazing the extent to which partners will go to conceal their actions. Likewise we can spend an inordinate amount of time and effort trying to 'catch' our partners. Spy gear, cameras, Private investigators, sperm detection kits are all widely used. But most of the time we already knew what the private investigator was going to tell us. Our gut instinct told us what the camera would show. We were just hopig we were wrong. |
