Best one liners to dump your girl

Last Updated on Thursday, 29 July 2010 11:52 Monday, 26 July 2010 12:54

Its time to say goodbye. You had a good run kiddo. It was fun while it lasted. But its time to move on. Her once delightful laughter now sounds more like a witches cackle, she's added a few pounds, her friend is better looking. Whatever the reason, its best to get these things over quickly. Not for you the long will-we won't-we break up routine. Its best to lump it all on her in one quick go, sharp and brutal, devastating and leaving her in no illusion that you're leaving her sorry ass. What better way to flick that chick to the side than a sharp witty one-liner? Or just a cruel put down that will shatter her self confidence for years to come. Check out our best (and worst) one liners for dumping your girlfriend.

1. We're breaking up because its not me, its you. Its all fucking YOU.

2. Sorry, I don't do fat chicks. You knew the rules. Goodbye.

3. Hey, I always thought you knew it was just sex?

4. I've found somebody else. Wayyyyy better than you.

5. If you're not going to do the whole threesome thing, then I can't see a point in us staying together.

6. Suck my dick one last time. Bitch.

7. Fuck it, You make me want to puke.

8. You know how people fall in love? Well I hate you're guts. Totally.

9. Mind if I hit on your sister?

10. From now on, you're dead to me.

11. Our love grew with the rising sun. But now its night. Fuck off.

12. Your love washed over me, just as the tide washes over the sand. Then it began

grating me. Now its drowning me. I need to escape before you kill me.(Eh, one liners? - Ed).

13. Honey, you remember all those nights we spent together? Biggest fucking mistakes of my life.

14. Here, I packed everything you own. Its time for you to get the fuck outta my life.

15. Sorry, but it's just...I've decided not to date losers anymore.